Hollow Girl

Just sharing a poem from my dark days. Apparently I was pretty good at poetry, just not making it so pretty....

Hollow Girl

By

Tabbie Porter

I am a girl who is hollow

I wonder where emotions come from

I hear the cries of others in the whistling wind

I see the walking dead

I want peace between heaven and hell

I am a girl who is hollow.

I pretend to see what others don't

I feel the presence of the Gods below me

I touch the fire beneath the Earth's crust

I worry about the fears that surround me

I cry at the thought of departure

I am a girl who is hollow.

I understand the hatred in their eyes

I say "Life goes on and never dies"

I dream of angels watching me

I try to understand our differences

I hope to see the light around me

I am a girl who is hollow.

Guilty Pleasures

So we are all guilty of enjoying the pleasures of life that should be left alone. Not necessarily bad things, but things we all know we'd probably be better off without. I'm going to share my top 10 guilty pleasures. They are all random, not in any specific order.

1. Folger's Chocolate Silk Coffee--What kind of world would I live in without this stuff?? I was never a huge coffee drinker. Winter is perfect for drinking the stuff though. And since I discovered the chocolate flavored coffee...I've been hooked!

2. Soap--Yeah I know, we all need some soap in our lives! But I truly am addicted to the stuff. I have to have at least 3 types of shampoo's/conditioners and body wash. Doesn't haven't to be different brands. Just different scents. I was cleaning out my bathroom the other night, seeing I have this addiction to all this soap. I filled up a cosmetic basket pretty quickly. My last count was 6 bottles of shampoo, 4 bottles of conditioner, 7 bottles of body wash, and 3 bars of soap. That was just in the master bathroom. There are rare instances in which I make myself shower in the main bath, so I have several bottles in there too. Kids don't mind. Oldest 3 are girls. Youngest 2, well they're just babies and really could care less, so long as they can splash the water with their feet.

3. Laundry Soap--Sorry this one fits in a different category from the above please. I absolutely LOVE the smell of clean clothes. My soap, liquid fabric softner and dryer sheets must have the same scent, or fairly close. Right now I'm in love with ALL's fresh rain. It makes me melt.

4. ChapStick--No particular brand. I just have to have the stuff. Every time we make a trip to the store I'm buying more. I don't use it often either. In fact, I just tossed out a tube of the stuff last night because it was a couple years old. I only apply it 3 or 4 times a week. But I must have some at all times. In the bathrooms, laundry room, my coat, my purse, the diaper bag...anywhere I'm going to be I must have some on hand.

5. World of Warcraft--I love this game! I can't live without it. What's even funnier is half the time I don't really play the game. I love to log in, select a character and just sit in Orgrimmar. I sit and read trade channel chat. Which is usually pretty immature topics, but better then Barrens chat (which is ALL about Chuck Norris). Sometimes I log in just to chat with friends. And sometimes I will actually play the game. Kinda sad I spend more time reading/talking then playing the game, I'm paying $15 a month for it.

6. Flip flops--Or thongs as some call them. Or flick flocks as I love to call them. I can't stand wearing tennis shoes. And heels are sooo not my thing. Snow, rain, sleet, doesn't matter, must have my flick flocks. I don't buy them a lot. Usually just one or 2 pair a year. I think I must have been a hippie in a previous life (no offense to anyone who may be one now). I'd much rather be bare foot and carefree about things.

7. Post-It Notes--My wall next to my desk is covered in the little things. I have addresses, phone numbers, appointments, schedules....every thing stuck to my wall next to my desk. I love being able to just turn and see what I'm looking for. I know, sticky notes aren't really anything to be guilty about. Maybe later I'll take a picture and show you all just how OCD I am about it though. (not that anyone is reading my blog)

8. Michale Jackson's song "The Way You Make Me Feel"--For anyone that knows me, this can be scary. I can't sing to save my life, nor can I really dance. So, if I'm around and that song is playing--make a quick run for it! I just have to sing and dance away to it. And I must hear it everyday or I go nuts. In fact, I've listened to it 3 times since starting this entry.

9. Having fun in the bathroom--This is not the typical "dress up" fun. I love to be able to instant message, test, shop online and talk on the phone all while....sitting on the toilet!! Most people like to read magazines or books. I just can't. They distract me too much from the job I'm working on. So, my cell phone stays in my pocket all day, and I leave my laptop on a shelf next to the toilet. I sometimes let me friends in on the secret with a simple "you're going to the bathroom with me".

10. Cookies--Not just any cookies. I'm talking the mini-sugar cookies with sprinkles that Walmart makes. Man I just love those things! I usually have the whole box gone by the end of the day. Which is why I generally don't buy them often. But man they are GOOD! I don't know why, seeing I'm really not a fan of sugar cookies lol.

Well, those are my top 10 "guilty pleasures". I can't say I really feel guilty about all of them. But most I do (like, eating a box of cookies in day! that means none for the next day hehe).

What are some of yours? Do we have any in common?

Signed,

Super Mom

University of Florida News - Breastfeeding offers variety of benefits for people in hard times

University of Florida News - Breastfeeding offers variety of benefits for people in hard times

Breastfeeding

I will openly admit, I am not up to date on all the fashions and laws of breastfeeding. So, this is all just going to be my own opinion.

Firstly, why is something so natural, bond to so many laws?? I will never understand this one. Woman were built to nourish their children. It's the reason we lactate. Um, hello, why the hell else do we have this liquid gold excreting from our breast?

Why must we cover ourselves in heavy blankets when out in public? My choice to plop out a boob to feed my hungry child shouldn't cause controversy. Now, I'm not saying we should be allowed to stripped down to bare chest to feed our children. I do believe some discretion is necessary. But not to the point that we should be forced to purchased specially made blankets to hide what our bodies were intended to do. If you do it right, you shouldn't need anything extra. It's seriously not that hard to just pull your shirt up just enough to allow your child to latch on.

Now the process of having your child latch on could be a little different. When they are still tiny, it's pretty simple, they don't flop around as much. They're more focused on eating then being aware of their surroundings. When the child is older, they do tend to unlatch to catch up on the world around them from time to time. Still, this shouldn't require a cover up. Best thing for this would be to excuse yourself to a restroom until the child has latched on. If you're not near a restroom then turn to a wall, have someone stand in front of you etc. If your child is one that likes to unlatch and look around during a feeding, then keep your hand close and be prepared. If he or she wants to roll their head around to see what's going on, then simply be ready to either cover the breast with your hand or pull your shirt down over the breast.

Simple. Easy. No effort needed.

For those of you who are offended at seeing a mother breastfeed her child, look away. There's nothing that says you must watch her do such a thing. If it makes you uncomfortable, move to another spot. Yeah I'm sure not many will agree with me there. After all, why should you be forced to move because you are in view of something you think is obscene? Again, this is where I bring up the point that it's a nature thing no mother should feel guilted into hiding.

Lately, breastfeeding has been receiving such a nasty name. Recently there was a news story about a women being charged with felony for hitting a guard with her breast milk. I didn't read the article. I heard all the glamor from various groups though. Apparently it started with her going to jail for something else, she was required to strip down. You know the drill. Then suddenly the woman squirted the guard. I find it funny. Yes, improper. But still, funny.

Then there's the story of a man making cheese from his wife's extra breast milk. Don't see the problem there. How do you think the other cheese starts?? Sure, cheese isn't made from a lactating woman. But it is made from a lactating animal. I'd choose the Mommy Milk Cheese first. It's full of yummy antibodies we could all use.

I'm not really sure where I was going with this. But it's been on my mind for a while now. I just don't get it. If breastfeeding is so much encouraged, then why must we work so hard at it? Why are we forced to be secretive about it? Why is it taboo to make healthy use of the extra?

Signed,

Super Mom

Starting Over

I seriously suck at this blogging thing. Good thing I call myself Super Mom and not Super Blogger.

Since it has been so long from my last post, I think it's only appropriate I give a short update on things and then start over. I'm going to stick with it this time. I'll attempt to post more then once a day. But my goal is at least once a day.

Not too much has happened in the past 2 months. Moose and Kermit are now 4 months old and growing great.

Using nicknames is hard...not sure I'll always remember them. So I think I'll just start using their real names. What does it matter if someone finds out who Super Mom really is?

Tori (formally known as Tadpole) turned 8 years old at the end of January. She's still missing her front teeth. Except now she's missing a couple on the bottom also.

Josie (formally known as Miss Sunshine) is still stubborn and spoiled. Every time we make a trip to the store she has to get a new toy or dress. I don't like it. It's $10-20 we could have saved. But I also don't want to listen to the fit she'll throw.

I seriously need to work on that girl. She's spoiled in everything. She doesn't have to eat what is made for dinner. Most times I'm cooking two meals...one for her and one for everyone else. She's stubborn to boot. She will starve herself before eating something new. We were doing good for a while there. She was actually trying new food. Then James (aka Stud) went and clutter our kitchen table and we were forced to eat elsewhere. Thus Josie wasn't seeing that we were all eating the same thing.

Emmit (aka Moose) is getting closer to rolling from back to tummy. He gets on his side and tries. But usually just lands on his back again. I think he's trying to hold his own bottle too. Which is rather annoying. He refuses to eat if I hold him. Which means propping a bottle for him. Since he doesn't have great hand control he usually knocks the bottle over...several times. Which ends in me getting annoyed. I know he can't help it, but seriously every other minute I'm getting up to fix it.

Miles has gone on a nursing strike. It took us 2 months to get him to latch on. And he was doing great. We even managed to no longer have to give him bottles of formula. Until last week. He just wants nothing to do with the boob juice maker. He arches away like it's some sort of mutinous monster waiting to infect him with a deadly disease.

Ok, so that was a bit extreme.

Nicole moved back in with us. She's 15 years old. I swear her fits are worse then Josie's...who will be 4 tomorrow.

I think that's about it for now. I have some more cleaning to pretend to be doing. I'll update again if I make it out alive.

Signed,

Super Mom

When All Things End

It's nearing the closing of another night. I can't say anything special has occurred. I was completely lazy today. Or rather that's how it seems. Personally I FELT like I kept up with my persona.

The twins--whom shall be called Kermit & Moose--did their usual stuff. One would fuss while the other slept. They could not seem to both sleep at the same time. However, they did manage to communicate and fuss together.

I love when Moose starts screaming and you set him in Lamb. He rubs his face all over it and then jumps when you start the vibrations. Then again, if I suddenly had something vibrating under my ass I think I'd go flying too.

Kermit likes to babble when you try rocking him. But goes silent when he's sitting in Boink.

I wonder why they don't get excited about that vibration. While I'd probably freak out at the sudden outset of it, I wouldn't mind the feeling in the end. Must be relaxing. Like your own personal massage without ever leaving home.

Kermit tried kicking his diaper onto his sister Miss Sunshine. She didn't like that one.

I wonder if I should mention Kermit & Moose are 2 months old?

Tried out a new breastfeeding position with Kermit tonight. I wanted to see if I could be even more lazy. So we layed in the bed. He did rather well the first go. I think that position helped to empty the breast even more.

Kermit did not like swapping sides. Wonder if it had something to do with the way I smell?

Miss Sunshine...I don't remember much of her today. I think she spent most of her time in K & M's room watching cartoons. I did lay upon her "bed" and watch her play her "DS".

You should probably know her DS isn't really that. Truth be told, it's just a Game Boy Advanced. Tadpole has a DS. That's where she picks it up from. Whatever. She stays happy with it.

Oh that's right, we lounged on the couch. Today was a Law & Order: SVU marathon.

Did I mention Tadpole is our 7 year old daughter? Or that Miss Sunshine is 3 years old?

I managed to put the cradle into the living room.

I still don't understand that one. Why is it called a living room? Are the rooms in the home called dead room? I suppose if you have teenagers that's what you could call their bedrooms. I don't think I want to speculate on that too much.

So yeah, moved the cradle. Picked up enough toys to realize we have carpet...and it's green. Not a pretty shade, but it's there.

Oh! Washed more clothes. I swear if someone says they have nothing clean I'm going to beat them over the head with a shovel. So...if you hear on the news of some children being beaten with a shovel by a mad woman---it was most likely me.

Dinner was...food. Made chili. Didn't like it. Stuffed myself with cookies instead.

Stud is staying home from work tomorrow. I'm thinking I will force him into the role of Super Dad.

By the way, Stud is my husband.

Super Dad. I can't even bring up a giggle over that one. It's such a sad thought it's not possible to laugh.

Super Dad...do they really exist?

Signed,
Super Mom

New Meat on the Menu Tonight

You hear the meowing. There's a cat stuck under your home. You tell yourself, you'll just help get it out. No way do you need another pet. And you stick to your guns. Until you see it's just a kitten and it's so cute looking.

So, in comes another cat. At first, she uses your floor as a litter box. You get pissed, but just keep moving on. After all, she was an outdoor kitten. After a couple days she finally figures it out. From time to time you notice her squating against the wall. A quick move towards her and she runs for the litter box.

Over time, she's using the floor more and more. It's cold outside, so you hesitate to throw her out. Until finally, she makes the wrong move...

You've recently gone grocery shopping. It's late in the evening, and you don't have the energy to put them all away. So, you leave a few bags of non perishable food on the floor. No big deal, they won't go bad, and you'll probably use it all soon.

The babies need a new can of formula opened. Little buggers, they eat a lot. You reach down for the bags and immediately drop them. Something wet is all over it is wet. Upon further inspection, you notice it's urine. That stupid little fur ball you thought was so cute used your bags of groceries as a litter box. That's the last straw. You search the house until you find her. Pick her up and toss her out into the cold snow. Let her freeze out there. You don't care anymore.

Now you're left with the tough decision. Do you keep the cans of formula? Only a couple are wet. A few just have a faint smell, and the others are just fine. Do you risk feeding your baby formula laced with cat urine? How can you be sure any of it did or did not make it through the can?

Most people may find this an easy decision. The obvious solution would be to just toss it all. It's not that easy when you have twins both eating every 4 hours. For just one of those cans, it cost you $15. There were 8 cans in those bags. That's $125 worth of precious baby nutrients.

Do I really want to throw it all away? Maybe if I just throw out the cans that are for sure wet. Things will be fine. The cans are durable. They're meant to keep light moisture. But cat urine? Is it really worth it?

Signed,
Super Mom