You Won't Understand

No one will understand.  And I don't think I can explain it enough for you.

Yesterday (Friday) I took a pregnancy test.  No, we weren't trying.  Yes, I'm taking birth control, and religiously at that.  But, I had a reason to believe that I was either pregnant or I had ovulated.  It came back with a "maybe".  It was one of those "1 line means no, 2 lines means yes".  The control line was dark and no doubt there.  However, the result window, the one that determined your results, was faint.  There was a line, but it was very faint.  So, I thought, OK I'm pregnant.

As the night progressed I slowly allowed myself to get excited.  After all, James was teasing me about it.  Which was even better, since he really doesn't want anymore children.

And then, I took a test this afternoon.  A digital test so there is no doubt.  And it came back "not pregnant".  I instantly began crying.  I actually DID want to be pregnant.  I can't believe I allowed myself to fall for it.  I allowed myself to get excited about something that I knew most likely meant no.  I should have known better.  After all, I did at one point spend 2 years of putting myself through that.  Only difference is at the time I was trying.

This is hitting me hard.  James doesn't want more.  The only way I'll have more is if the birth control fails.  As I thought it did this time.  I can understand his reasoning.  He'll be 40 years old in a couple months.  That's hard for both of us.  I'll be 27 in July.  Such a huge age gap between us when it comes to have babies.  He keeps telling me he's just going to get fixed.  After today, I'm tempted to tell him to shut up and do it already.  I'm so done with this.  I'm tired of getting slightly excited only to find out the test was a fail.

Oh well.  So goes life.

Signed,
Super Mom

Harry Potter Galore

Well, it's getting closer to Tori's 10th birthday.  And she has requested a Harry Potter themed party.  That can get expensive if you're not careful.  Luckily, I was able to make use of things around the house to get me started.

I started with invitations.  No, they don't look as good as store bought ones.  But, they still get the message out.  I used my PrintMaster program to achieve the "postcard" look.  And then I glued on various Harry Potter images.  The images were provided by Shel's Tarts & Crafts.  I thought she did a truly amazing job considering she doesn't know much about Harry Potter.  I also used Avery White Postcards/Index Cards paper to print them one.  Comes 4 to a sheet, so I didn't need to cut.

Next, I decided to make Harry Potter water bottles.  These were very simple.  I wish I could remember where I got the idea and instructions from, but I can't.  I took the images I got from Shel and glued them to blue cardstock paper (I cut the paper across the short distance, so 8 inches long, and then it was 2.5in tall).  Take a piece of packaging tape a little longer then your cut paper.  Place the paper face DOWN on the tape, then wrap around the bottle.  Because the tape is longer then the paper, you start with it taped to the bottle.  And once you wrap around to the end, there should still be tape to tape it down again.  I ended up using 2 pieces of tape overlapping so I could cover the entire label.  This way if the images/paper gets wet it would tear or "leak" ink.

And next I am making these pendants as party favors.  I created these images myself.  I have others (Hermione, Ron, an owl, etc).  Squares are my thing lol.  I used scrabble tiles to create the pendants.  And then stringed on some tiny seed beads.  It has a lobster claw closure so the kids can take them on and off without stretching and breaking the necklace.  I only finished one so far.  I'm going to need 10 total.  Well, that's assuming everyone shows up.  Which is why I haven't made them all yet.  Although if I have extras, I could either use them as prizes or sell them (I've been known to get $20 for one necklace made like this).

I'm being smart this year with the party.  It is NOT going to last 4 hours.  Just two.  And I've figured out how to fill in the time.  We're going to have one game, "Pin the tail on Dudley".  James will be drawing "Dudley" on a poster board for me (Ok really, it's just going to be a goofy cartoon-ish boy drawing.  Who's to say there isn't a Dudley out there somewhere that'll look just the same?).  And then we'll hopefully have 2 craft projects to do.  I want to get materials to make their own HP themed wands (looks easy enough--needs chopsticks) and then their own quills (really it's just regular ink pens wrapped with thread and a feather attached).

We'll see how it goes.  Her party is scheduled for Feb. 4th, a week after her birthday.  Wish me luck!

I Have a Goal

Ok I did it.  I went ahead and gave myself a "new year resolution".  Normally I don't do this because I think it's dumb.  Don't be hating, it's just not my thing.  Remember, I said setting a resolution is dumb, not the person doing it.  I don't think any less of a person for having a goal or anything like that.

Anyhow...

My goal for 2012 is...

DE-CLUTTER!!!

It's not going to be an easy task.  I've yet to find a "program" that works for me.  I don't want to take the entire year to get through this junk, yet I can't do it all in 30 days (flylady's way, which is pretty good, just not ready for that pace right now).

I'm going to focus on one room at a time.  And I'll work on it everyday.  Well, everyday that James has work haha.  Since it's *mostly* his clutter, I can't let him see me going through it.  I'm going to start in my living room, to include the cabinets that extend in there from the kitchen.  I'm going to make 3 "piles"--

1.  Keep
2.  Yard Sale Worthy
3.  Toss

And after the yard sale, I'll sort that stuff again.  Except it'll go down to 2 "piles"--save for the next yard sale or toss.  No more bringing in more junk without getting rid of some old.  I have 6 cabinets that extend into my living room that aren't truly functional right now.  They just sorta have junk crammed into them.  Not organized.  It's just stuff we needed out of the way and crammed in.  It's seriously dangerous to open some of those cabinets.  Things could easily fall out and hurt you!

Thinking about it, I might need a 4th "pile".  One for my stuff.  I know I have a few misc. things stuffed into the cabinets.  And most is various craft items I'd like to keep but need to put in a better spot.  Which is why the laundry room will be my second area to clean.  It's so cluttered in there that I can no longer properly store my craft items.  Sad thing is, I don't even have much craft stuff in there anymore!  James has been storing boxes of junk back there.

I think while I'm working on other areas of the house, I'll have James focus on our bedroom.  I'd like to make use of our closest.  It would be great to store his "end of the world" junk in there (yes, my husband truly believes the world will end in December this year).

I think I want to get another card table for my bedroom.  Put my craft stuff in here instead of the laundry room.  It's where most of it is anyways.  Just not organized very well due to lack of proper storage and the stuff.

Jeepers it's 1am!  And I don't get to sleep in tomorrow.  Not even sure I'll get a nap.

That's my plan, my goal, my resolution.  De-clutter this trailer!

Signed,
Super Mom